I am so struck by your phrase, "I almost knew." The girl you were--already so alert, sensitive, responsible--facing such an impossible situation and opting for self-blame. Powerful, tough, honest. Crystallized something for me. Thank you.
Thank you so much. I’m very glad it landed with you. I didn’t know that phrase or feeling when I started writing the essay, I learned as I wrote. 🧡 thank you for taking the time to write to me. xN
So compelling and sad, Natalie. Why do we raise our daughters to be responsible for everyone’s happiness, particularly our mother’s? I can already see this happening with Dottie. And yet you love her.
I wish I’d been taught about boundaries, I wish I’d taught my daughter about boundaries. I wish my mother had been taught about boundaries!! Yiyiyi. Thank you, Barbara, for reading and letting me know. I’m grateful. xN
I know the feeling of knowing things should be kept a secret. Even now, when I talk about my mother’s dementia and the shit show happening around it, I feel that same feeling. Somebody’s going to get in trouble… Thinking of you.
Why did you have to move again?
Good question. Bus stop situation? Horrible house on a highway? xN
I am so struck by your phrase, "I almost knew." The girl you were--already so alert, sensitive, responsible--facing such an impossible situation and opting for self-blame. Powerful, tough, honest. Crystallized something for me. Thank you.
Thank you so much. I’m very glad it landed with you. I didn’t know that phrase or feeling when I started writing the essay, I learned as I wrote. 🧡 thank you for taking the time to write to me. xN
Heartbreaking and beautifully written.
Thank you, Sacha! The funny thing is, we hold these stories and we don’t even realize how heartbreaking they are until we set them down. xN
"Til we set them down" -- yes. In writing or by talking about them.
exactly. yes. I wish us all the opportunity to set them down. xN
So compelling and sad, Natalie. Why do we raise our daughters to be responsible for everyone’s happiness, particularly our mother’s? I can already see this happening with Dottie. And yet you love her.
I wish I’d been taught about boundaries, I wish I’d taught my daughter about boundaries. I wish my mother had been taught about boundaries!! Yiyiyi. Thank you, Barbara, for reading and letting me know. I’m grateful. xN
I know the feeling of knowing things should be kept a secret. Even now, when I talk about my mother’s dementia and the shit show happening around it, I feel that same feeling. Somebody’s going to get in trouble… Thinking of you.
I am right there beside you. Thanks for reading, and take good care. xN
Oh my friend. So much to hold and so much to let go of. I’m so glad to have read this and to know little Natalie. She’s amazing.
Thank you, Jen. For reading and for letting me know. xxN