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at what point does a group of strangers become a community? (a freebie!πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰)
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at what point does a group of strangers become a community? (a freebie!πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰)

a new friend, a tweak in your world view ++ westerns to love and a flexible sauce

Natalie Serber's avatar
Natalie Serber
Apr 03, 2025
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at what point does a group of strangers become a community? (a freebie!πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰)
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Hooray! This post is free for all!

hey-hey,

Welcome friends! I’m delighted to bring the third installation in the PEOPLE IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD series. On a recent ramble through my neighborhood I got to thinking about Sesame Street (as one does), particularly about the song, β€œThe people in your neighborhood.”

We’re all surrounded by interesting and thoughtful people, and since building and nurturing community is my goal for 2025-2029, I thought I’d pay closer attention to people around me. So far we’ve met Sylvie, your new bonne amie, and Deborah, the best anxiety doctor who gave us great advice and kinship!

…

Enter Will! Why? Well, Will exudes equanimity and doubles down with kindness and humor. Will and his partner Danyelle are the owners/hosts/chef/wine stewards of a fantastic wine bar and shop a few blocks from my home. Division Wines flourishes with good vibes and friendly people. It brings a kind of magic to the neighborhood… the third place we all need.

I’m delighted to share Will’s thoughts on life, books, music, a very flexible recipe, and of course, a couple of wine picks!

…

Will: Here at the bar I get to witness community every day. It is a privilege to hear people’s stories. By listening we learn so much about ourselves. It’s not like people won’t hit a nerve when they talk with you, politics, attitude, whatever, but when they do, you’ve got to cradle your umbrage like a baby. Watch yourself and remain curious. That’s where the opportunity to be a better person lies. Look, everyone has a story… we can’t allow ourselves to draw conclusions about people from the outside.

At 22 I had a brain injury and memory loss. I had been ferocious reader and had started college, but my plans were thwarted by my accident. I had no insuranceβ€”was poor in the wealthiest country in the world.

Will receded into his cave at that time. He could retain nothing, wrote his address on his hand. Reading was like pouring water through a strainer. He describes that period as a sort of switch flipping.

Will: I was monochromatic before the accident. I had just two emotions: anger and desire/excitement. I wouldn’t even call it joy. The accident introduced me to depression/sadness and to fear. It had been simmering beneath all the time. I just didn’t allow myself to feel it. Growing up, my mother and sisters imparted softness and kindness. I owe my mother so much for who I came to be, and still, our home was a pretty toxic male environment. There wasn’t room for those other emotions.

But the accident was the best thing that happened to me. I was a rascal before! The accident, which really messed up my face and my brain, turned me away from more potential disasters. Then I used restaurants to put myself back together, working in the dish pit, then bussing, waiting tables, bar backing, and then bar tending. Restaurants were my self-invented occupational therapy. I challenged my memory every night, who was drinking what? Who was sitting where? That’s how my brain healed.

All of us invent ourselves, right? The stories we tell ourselves about our lives, the things we believe about ourselves, that’s who we become. Sometimes we get confused and think the world, or politics, or our luck (good or bad), is writing our story. Will fiercely believes where we choose to focus, how we choose to frame the things that happen to us, gives us power.

We can tap into our own audacity to change.

Will: I see it all the time. People who have been through terrible things have found ways to be the light in their own existence. Look, we are all the ages we’ve ever been all at once… our 7-year-old self, 20, 34, 46, and for me 63. We are all the ages simultaneously. In order to live clean, we need to stay in the present, not bring in our history or trauma. Our backstory has no place in the present interactions we have with people around us. Get about the business of being here.


Thank you paid subscribers!

If you’re a free subscriber maybe you’re looking for a way to say thanks… it’s easy, become a paid subscriber to support my work. I’d love that for both of us!


read:

After the accident, Will fell down a Louis L’Amour prairie dog hole. The novels appealed to him because of their simple conceit: bad guys vs. good guys, someone in need of saving and someone needing to suffer for justice to be served…heroes and women. When Will got lost in the narratives due to his brain injury he could easily get back in since the books were formulaic. He read every single novel. BENDIGO SHAFTER, was a favorite. The flap teases:


β€œAt what point does a group of strangers become a community?”

Wow! That seems perfect for Will’s mission with Division Wines.

β€œWhen young Bendigo Shafter and a ragtag bunch of travelers settle in the rugged Wyoming mountains, they quickly come to depend on a toughness and wisdom many of them never knew they possessed. Led by the beautiful and resourceful widow Ruth Macken, the settlers battle harsh winters, renegade opportunists, and the destructive lure of gold. Through these brutally demanding experiences, young Bendigo is forged into a man.”

Can’t you hear the deep masculine voice reading this teaser to you? We can totally see why this appealed to young Will.

…

In case you are enthralled by the idea of reading a western, I’ve got a couple of suggestions:

If you’ve not read LONESOME DOVE, by Larry McMurtry (which won the Pulitzer), it might be the perfect novel to take you away from the world.

I’ve already spoken in this newsletter about Victor LaValle’s book, LONE WOMEN, which is a mash up of a western and gothic tale of ghosts, racial trauma, and homesteading in Montana. I absolutely loved the book.

PLAINSONG is a gorgeous and tender and surprising novel. A National Book Award finalist, it is set in the west, about two bachelor brothers who take in a pregnant teenager and care for her. The novel is a lyric meditation on the necessity of family.

And of course if you’re looking for truly dark (no judgment) grab yourself some Cormac McCarthy.

…

Will also recommends these two books about wine:

ADVENTURES ON THE WINE ROUTE, by Kermit Lynch. His story is about travel and wine. A young man discovering the producers who later came to be the pillars of his import business. It’s about the people first and then the wine.

Also a heavy book called WINE AND WAR, The French, the Nazis, and the Battle for France's Greatest Treasure, by Donald Kladstrup and Petie Kladstrup.


Want more community in 2025? We have zoom r.w.e. book group! Our April selection is MARGO’S GOT MONEY TROUBLES, by Rufi Thorpe, which is a delightful page turner with some teeth. We meet on 13 April @ 9:30a PDT.

The book group is a perk for paid subscribers and let me tell you we are a lively bunch!

Go ahead, upgrade to paid and claim your spot. I hope to get to know you better!

πŸ’› Yes! I'll upgrade to paid!


Check my read.write.eat. Bookshop Store, where you will find many of the books I've recommended in the newsletter. Buying books from my shop is a way you can be a friend to the newsletter.


listen :

Will mentioned listening to Dolly Parton while cooking with his wife Danielle. He’s a huge fan.

Will: Dolly Parton is magical. She has a core kindness that her externals don’t seem to line up with. A strong, beautiful, kind, and awesome human beingβ€”why did she choose the externals she chose? Everybody has a complicated story… Just maybe her implants and wigs weren’t intended only to attract male attention only. What if she just wanted to look that way? What if it was her own standard of beauty? Can we create a space where we imagine the best intention rather than a threat.

Here we are talking about a woman’s body again. But/and I understand the conundrum, and apparently so did Dolly Parton who often said to interviewers, β€œI’m up here,” drawing their eyes to her face. Here’s a fascinating take down of an interview between Barbara Walters and Dolly Parton.

β€œI am very real where it counts and that is inside, and as far as my outlook on life and the way I care about people and the way I care about myself….I am sure of myself as a person. I am sure of my talent. I like the kind of person I am.” β€”Dolly Parton

Of course, Jolene is a favorite song, about humility and humanity. For more on Dolly, do listen to DOLLY PARTON’S AMERICA, a terrific podcast and the Jolene episode is so so great.

Here’s a playlist of 100 Covers of Jolene! I particularly love The Little Willie’s.

And, here’s Beyonce’s cover:


πŸ’«πŸ’«πŸ’«If you enjoy r.w.e. will you kindly pause to hit the ❀️ at the top left or bottom of this post? It sure does help in the substack scheme of things and gives me a lift! xoNatalie πŸ’«πŸ’«πŸ’«


eat/drink:

Will: Romesco is everything… you can eat it with a spoon. something to put on bread, on pasta, on vegetables. Let’s not put things in boxes. Why be prescriptive? Is it a pasta sauce? A veggie dip?

Listening to Will wax poetic on this sauce, I want to change my name to Romesco! It has a certain flair, no? I’ve seen variations on the sauce, made with cashews or hazelnuts, with the addition of a jalapeΓ±o. It all sounds terrific. Experiment. Serve with skirt steak, with shrimp, with chicken, or tofu. The sauce is truly versatile.

Whole Roasted Cauliflower w/Romesco

  • 3 red bell peppers

  • 1 med head cauliflower

  • Olive oil

  • Salt and pepper

  • Β½ c Marcona almonds

  • 1 garlic clove, peeled

  • 1T sherry vinegar

  1. Fill a large pot β…” of the way with water, and set to boil; turn on the broiler, and put the rack about 4 inches from the heat source. Put the peppers on a foil-lined baking sheet, and broil, turning as each side browns, until they have darkened and collapsed, 15 to 20 minutes. Wrap the peppers in the same foil that lined the pan; when they are cool enough to handle, remove the skins, seeds and stems (this is easiest under running water). Set aside.

  2. Move oven rack to the lowest setting. Heat the oven to 450. Remove the leaves from the cauliflower. When the water boils, salt it generously. Submerge the head of cauliflower in the water, reduce the heat to a simmer and cook until you can easily insert a knife into the center, 15 minutes or so. Don’t overcook.

  3. Using two spoons or a shallow strainer, transfer the cauliflower to a rimmed baking sheet, and pat dry with paper towels. Drizzle all over with olive oil, sprinkle with salt and roast until it’s nicely browned all over, 40 to 50 minutes.

  4. Meanwhile, combine the roasted red peppers, almonds, garlic, vinegar and a sprinkle of salt and pepper in a food processor. Turn the machine on and stream in ΒΌ cup olive oil; purΓ©e into a thick paste. Taste, and adjust the seasoning.

  5. When the cauliflower is nicely browned, transfer it to a serving platter. Cut it into slices or wedges, and serve the romesco on the side for dipping.

…

What to pour? Here are two very reasonably priced wines Will loves.

Will: When I was younger I liked wine but I had no money. So I had to learn about wine, about grapes, to find what I liked and what I could afford. These two wines appeal to me because I’m attracted to things which I feel are under appreciated or overlooked. Sauv blanc in the Loire Valley is well known. But, Menetou-Salon is an under-accessed village where sauv is grown at a great price.

Barbera is incredibly versatile. Juicy, with bright acidity. Super to pour with the Romesco. Barbera is over shadowed by Nebbiolo the crown jewel of the Piedmont, a very noble grape which makes beautiful wine. But Barbera is the work horse. Delicious and again, under appreciated.


Stanley and his pal Will:


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xN


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