I missed you!
a romp + a mystery, 3 wise thoughts, my love of salady-things
hey-ho!
Greetings from the Canadian Rockies where I’ve been hiking and biking and rafting for a week with a Backroads tour. I’m writing this from the lounge with my feet up, sipping a grapefruit rosemary mocktail, gazing out the window at an incredibly blue lake. All around I’m treated to a host of languages, lots of laughter. My heart is light and my feet are heavy from time on the trails. It’s really wonderful.
One benefit of traveling with a group is the ample opportunity to make new friends, to chat with people while we’re riding bikes, having lunch, being whisked to the next trailhead, toasting the day with a drink of choice.
Today on the trail we had a conversation about, of all things, Real Simple Magazine. Do you know it? Super sleek, featuring clean and well lit rooms, lovely tile and rugs, plush towels stacked on the lip of a deep tub, a flickering candle, suggestions for great lotion, a few good recipes, books to read, maybe an article about organizing your bills, or the space under your bathroom sink. I never subscribed to Real Simple, but when I felt low, I fell prey to the dream! You know what I mean? I’d be nagging myself in my head, about my parenting skills, my bad hair, my failed aspirations, a lackluster story, an off day in workshop, a sucky meal, weak or non-existent exercise. And lo! Standing in the checkout line I'd glimpse the magazine and feel a hiccup of hope. In that glossy magazine there was something small that I could do that would be a corrective! (Yes, I get how messed up that is… as if a magazine telling me how to improve is the key to a happiness… but what can I say?) The things in Real Simple were mostly achievable… no statuesque Vogue models making me feel sorrow over my short legs, no outrageous Architectural Digest homes in which I will never live, no fabulous out-of-reach Travel and Leisure vacations on a yacht in Greece, no seventeen-step Gourmet meals involving ten year old balsamic (though I do love those!). Real Simple felt within reach. I could do one small thing, I could knock over the first domino toward a sleeker, brightly lit, accomplished life.
The funny thing is, I’m not alone. The other women on the hike felt the same way! Even putting the magazine on the conveyor belt in the checkout line offered a buzz of potential! I don’t know about you, but I think that hit is a gift. Brava Real Simple and brava us for knowing that this too shall pass!
Is there are magazine you turn to for a boost when you’re landing a little bit below the happiness line? If so, let me know. Hit the button. Asking for a friend!
I hope my project, this newsletter, gives you a boost as well. A book to read. A writing prompt if you’re into it. A recipe. A cute dog! Boom! Here’s to the small things that lift us up.
read:
I basically snorted ELIGIBLE, by Curtis Sittenfeld, barreled through it this week. I’ve talked about the novel in the past so I won’t go deep here. If you need a light romp, a few laughs, some haughty moments in which you feel superior to the characters, plus the fun of puzzling out how the book uses PRIDE AND PREJUDICE, by Jane Austen, as a scaffold, go for it. It makes lingering poolside even lovelier.
It’s hot in Portland (yes, I’m home now) so I’m getting my hikes in early, and I’m listening to ASK AGAIN, YES, by Mary Beth Keane. While I described ELIGIBLE as a “light romp,” this novel is not that. I’m only one third of the way in and my walks are getting longer as I can hardly stop listening. The novel is about two families, the fathers both policemen in the 70s. As young cops they walk a beat together, later they each marry and wind up living next door to one another in a suburb of NYC. The couples don't become close because one of the wives is "off." Nobody has the therapeutic language at that time to grasp her struggles in a compassionate way. Due to proximity, two of the children, Peter and Kate, become very close, until their friendship is blown apart by a horrible incident and the world shifts. The story is gripping. The novel grapples with how our lives can be defined by happenstance. I’ll let you know what I think.
What did you think of the NYTs new content buzz: The 100 Best Books of the 21st Century? I’m not going to lie, I fell into the spell. Of course it feels a little crass to rank like this, books are such a personal experience for each reader. Yet, considering the news of late, our election, and well, everything, I was happy for the diversion. And, if it sells books, hooray! I marked the list and found I’d read 49 of the 100. Two I overlooked, WOLF HALL, by Hilary Mantel. THE WARMTH OF OTHER SUNS, by Isabel Wilkerson, are on my TBR list, plus I feel I should probably reread THE CORRECTIONS, by Jonathan Franzen. How about you? Was there a book that should have been included? Or something which didn’t deserve its ranking? I’d love to hear your thoughts.
For our next r.w.e. book group we will be reading and discussing GOD OF THE WOODS, by Liz Moore, described as “…riveting .. an epic mystery, a family saga and a survival guide.” I’m in! If you’ve not read any Liz Moore, do check it out. Also check HEFT, which I loved.
We meet on Zoom, 18 August from 9:30 - 11a PT. The book group is a perk for paid subscribers and let me tell you we are a lively bunch! Do consider joining us. A paid subscription is a mere $1.25 per week! Far less than the cost of one coffee. Go ahead, upgrade to paid and let me know if you’re in. I hope so!
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write:
I have three suggestions for you today:
No Wrong Turn.
When you’re writing, whether the start an essay, a story, a poem, or if you’re on hour 10,000 of your novel in progress, your memoir, there is no wrong turn. Yes the words you’re putting down may not end up in the final draft, but you must take wrong turns to make discoveries, to find out what you want to say, to learn more about yourself and your characters. Remember, the fact that you’re writing is a right turn! Don’t curse and shake your fist at supposed misspent time following a spur trail. Look at the views. What did you learn? Where did you finally end up?
Expiration dates are bullshit!
Don’t beat yourself up for what you should have already accomplished. I’m sorry, but f*ck the 5 under 35 and the lauding of youth. I mean, wonderful for the under 35s, but also wonderful for the 85s, and 65s. Check these writers: Bonnie Garmus published LESSONS IN CHEMISTRY at 65. Deborah Eisneberg published TRANSACTIONS IN A FOREIGN CURRENCY at 41. Harriet Doerr published her debut novel, STONES FOR IBARRA at 74. Why-oh-why do we allow this obsession with youth culture to pollute our well being? I’d love to read a novel from a woman who has survived the kicks-in-the-teeth that life generously provides.
Nurture your creativity.
To nurture our creative selves we must be protective of our time, our brains, and our hearts. Yes, people and obligations invade, that’s called life and it’s amazing. Yet, we should guard our creative selves. How?
Be wary of what you let in. (Farewell news cycle!) Pay attention to what stimulates you in the best way.
Do nothing for stretches of time. Leave your phone behind, or if you’re addicted to your step count, put your phone on airplane mode. I’ve written in this newsletter about the value of boredom. Allow your mind to wander. Stare out the window. Chop onions in silence.
That’s all I’ve got. I am cheering for you. Carry on!
The prompts now live in the P.S. (Paid Subscriber/Post Script 🥳) section at the bottom of this newsletter.
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eat:
It’s hard to readjust to cooking after vacation. However, this salady-thing made it easy.
Grilled Scallops w/Corn, Peaches, & Tomatoes
Olive oil, as needed
2 ears corn
3 ripe peaches, halved and pitted
Salt and pepper (be very generous with the pepper)
8 - 12 large scallops
1c chopped fresh tomatoes— I used the always delightful sungold cherry toms, I urge you to do the same.
Chopped parsley, basil or chives
Ah, the ingredients!
Heat a charcoal or gas grill until very hot. If your grill grate is clean and in good shape, brush with a little oil and put it 3 or 4 inches from the heat. Ours is a wreck! I put a cast iron griddle across the grill and brushed that with olive oil.
Brush the corn and peaches with the oil, season w/salt and loads of pepper and grill until lightly browned all over. 4 minutes for the peaches. About 6 minutes for the corn. When cool enough to handle, strip the corn kernels off the cobs and cut the peaches into pieces larger than dice. Transfer to a large bowl.
Brush scallops with oil, sprinkle with salt and pepper and grill until they’re brown and release easily from the grill, 2 to 3 minutes per side. Remove them before the interior becomes totally opaque.
Halve the scallops and toss them into the bowl along with the tomatoes and herbs, corn and peaches. Drizzle with oil, season with salt and pepper and toss to coat. I also added some delicious balsamic vinegar… decidedly not ten years old as I mentioned up top, but a decent vinegar none-the-less.
Do you have a salady-thing you love? LMK, please.
Remember, paid subscribers have access to the index my kingdom of recipes! If you’re a paid subscriber and need the link, let me know. If you aren’t yet a paid subscriber and you want the link, you know what to do!
And here’s Stanley, at noon! The lie-about!
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Tell your people you love them, and take good care of your skin.
xN
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